A monthly group mentorship that puts a certified funnel strategist in your business on the reg.
Stop avoiding your funnels.
Start making more money.
Join now! Doors close october 1st!
WTFunnel?!?
For service providers who need their funnels to sell.
Join WTFunnel?!? today!
Your funnel only works if you personally drag it across the finish line. Every time.
You've got an offer people actually want, leads coming in, and a launch or two under your belt that didn't completely fall apart.
Tired of duct-taping your funnels together and praying someone buys?
- A certified funnel strategist who knows what’s wrong and how to fix it
- Expert eyes on your funnel every single month to tell you what to double down on, not just when something breaks
- Someone to tell you where your marketing leaks are so you can fill them up and keep more money in your pockets.
Passive income? Only if you’ve got eyes on your funnel regularly.
And the 7-figure girlies screaming 'PASSIVE INCOME!' from the rooftops?
You’ve stalked their funnels.
Bought their tripwires.
Sat through the webinars
(even though they were a pitch fest).
And you’re still not making that money. That f*ck-you money.
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
dolla' dolla' billz
track the data over drama
Sales page
Evergreen sequence
LAunch sequence
Pre-LAunch sequence
Nurture sequence
WElcome sequence
Lead magnet/ tripwire
Visibility marketing
Do you have all of these pieces?
"woah, woah, woah!
Slow down Jenn!"
I've got you. CLiCk on any of those labels above if your're a little lost...
You looked at that list and thought, "I have most/all of this" — and you're still not making the sales you should be.
Or you looked at that list and thought, "I don't have any of this" — and now you know why you're not selling as much as your should be.
Either way, you're in the right place.
One of two things just happened:
Your future clients need a way to find you.
Social media, collaborations, podcasts, PR, ads, SEO, and the thirty-seven other ways you could get eyes on your business all feed people into your funnel.
But visibility without somewhere strategic to send them? That’s a lot of content creation for very little money.
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
This is where interested strangers become actual leads.
Your lead magnet should solve a specific problem, attract people who could eventually buy your offer, and give them a logical next step.
Downloads are lovely. Qualified leads who want what you sell are better.
Tripwires
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
Someone has invited you into their inbox. Please do not greet them with one lonely delivery email and then disappear for six weeks.
Your welcome sequence introduces your point of view, shows them how you can help, and moves them toward the offer that makes the most sense for them.
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
Most people will not buy five minutes after finding you. Rude, but true.
Your nurture emails keep building the relationship between promotions. They help your audience understand their problem, trust your approach, and remember that you exist when they’re finally ready to do something about it.
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
A good launch starts before the cart opens.
Your pre-launch content gets your audience thinking about the right problem, challenges the beliefs keeping them stuck, and prepares them for the offer you’re about to make.
That way, launch day feels like the next logical step instead of you bursting into their inbox yelling, “SURPRISE! BUY THIS!”
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
Your launch funnel helps someone make a confident decision while your offer is available.
It answers their questions, handles the very reasonable voice in their head asking, “But will this work for me?”, and gives them a reason to act now.
And yes, you can sell without emailing seventeen times in four days.
The whole damn point.
When every part of your funnel works together, more of the right people find you, stick around, and buy.
Your funnel stops being a pile of disconnected emails and abandoned automations and starts doing its actual job: turning attention into revenue without you personally dragging every sale across the finish line.
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
Your evergreen funnel keeps that sales conversation going after the launch confetti has been vacuumed up.
It connects new leads to the right offer at the right time and gives your business another way to make sales outside launches, referrals, and you personally showing up to close them.
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
Your sales page pulls the entire argument together.
It connects their problem to your offer, shows them why your approach makes sense, and gives them enough information to decide whether they’re in.
A prettier page will not rescue a disconnected funnel. The strategy leading people to it matters just as much as the words on it.
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
Your numbers tell you how the ecosystem is behaving.
Where are people entering? Where are they clicking? Where are they leaving? Which offer is converting? Which email is quietly doing absolutely nothing?
Data over drama. You use what’s happening to decide what needs attention next.
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
Track the Data
The whole damn point.
When every part of your funnel works together, more of the right people find you, stick around, and buy.
Your funnel stops being a pile of disconnected emails and abandoned automations and starts doing its actual job: turning attention into revenue without you personally dragging every sale across the finish line.
Your funnel is an ecosystem. And one neglected piece can f*ck with the whole thing.
Your funnel is not one opt-in, five emails, and a sales page you built during a caffeine-fuelled weekend in 2022.
A monthly group mentorship that puts a
certified funnel strategist in your business on the reg. so you sell more of your sh!t!
$297/month or $797 for 3 months
Welcome to WTFunnel?!?
2 Group Hot Seat Strategy Calls / Month
Stop second-guessing every move and start making the money your offer is already capable of generating.
Every call, you bring something... your biggest pain in the butt, a funnel you're building, a launch you're planning, copy you're not sure about, data you don't know how to read, or an idea you need someone to reality-check.
We solve it together, live, on the call. You leave with a clear next step. Each member is guaranteed at least 15 minutes of hot seat time.
2 Funnel Copy Reviews / Month
Expert eyes on your work before it goes live so you can stop wondering why it's not converting and start knowing exactly what to fix.
Between calls, you submit your Google Docs. Send your emails, subject lines, CTAs, sales page, nurture sequence map, or pre-launch plan. You get a Loom back by Thursday telling you exactly what to change and why, or I edit your Google Doc directly. Submit Tuesday, back by Thursday. 48 business hours.
💬
🧠
📝
🎓
📱
This is:
- Ongoing, expert funnel feedback without paying $10K for
an agency. - Strategy tailored specifically to your business.
- Focus on action, testing, and results.
A certified funnel strategist in your business every month, for less than what you’d pay a VA who maaaay not know what a conversion rate is.
Just $297/month or $797 for 3 months (first 10 founder spots only)
Looking for CAD pricing? I've got you, eh.
Slack Support Tuesdays + Thursdays
An answer before the spiral starts so you can keep moving instead of losing three days to a funnel panic.
Ask questions. Get feedback. Don’t funnel alone (seriously, why are you doing this alone?!).
Coworking Calls (optional)
Dedicated time to work ON your business instead of IN it, so you can actually build the thing that makes money while you sleep instead of pushing it to next week for the sixth week in a row.
For the person so busy serving clients that her own business gets the leftovers of her week. And for the neurodivergent besties for whom body doubling is the difference between getting it done and not getting it done.
Plug-and-Play Fixes and Mini-Learnings (optional)
Short, strategic trainings to support your funnel fixes. Plug-and-play copy and tech templates for when you just need a framework to get you out of writer's block.
As we grow in the program, I will add more mini-trainings and templates specific to what comes up week after week.
FOUNDING MEMBER 1:1 KICKSTART SESSION
Skip the first-date awkwardness and get straight to work so you can make the most of every single call from day one and start seeing results in month one instead of month three.
A private 30-minute session where I get to know you and your biz. I look at your funnel, understand your business from the inside out, and we build a clear plan for your first 90 days.
👯
Join WTFunnel?!? today!
Let's talk WTFunel?!? logistics:
Our first official call is Tuesday, October 6th.
Hot seat calls:
Every other Tuesday at 12pm EST (11am CST / 10am MST / 9am PST). Calls run up to two hours. Every member is guaranteed 15 minutes of hot seat time. If it's a smaller group, everyone gets more.
Funnel submissions:
Due every second Tuesday. Back in your inbox by Thursday. That's 48 business hours so you can implement before the weekend.
Slack support:
Tuesdays and Thursdays. Ask questions, share data, drop the win. You'll hear from me, not an assistant.
Co-working calls:
Every other Tuesday at 12 pm EST on the weeks we're not on a hot seat call. Show up, work on your funnel, and have someone in the room with you.
Platform:
Zoom for calls. Slack for everything in between. Google Docs or Loom for submission feedback.
Calls are recorded.
Can't make it live? You still get the recording and the notes.
What clients are saying...
CHANGE THIS TO WHAT A MONTH LOOKS LIKE
Week 4: You looked at your numbers and now...
Week 3: You need some help STAT
Week 2: Submission Week
Week 1: Hot Seat Call Week
What a month in WTFunnel?!? looks like
I do funnels that work.
And I built WTFunnel?!? Because brilliant women, queer folks, and community-minded business owners shouldn’t have to figure this out alone.
You’ve watched the webinars. Hired the freelancers. Bought the courses. Maybe even cried at 2am when you spent 8 hours editing a Reel and only 10 people saw it.
Still no funnel that consistently converts?
Then it’s time to try something new so you stop leaving money on the table.
Ready to make your funnel do its damn job?
Good. Because I have a plan and I’m not afraid to use it.
Looking for CAD pricing? I've got you, eh.
I'm Jenn Green!
A certified funnel
strategist and feminist
money enthusiast. I work with
lefty, values-aligned service providers (the ladies, theydies, and gaydies of the online business world).
I'm also a:
Maritimer, Wifey, ADHD Mama, Canadian living in Mexico, musical, mocha latte, and reality TV lover, AND formerly the successful creator and CEO of Baby Mama Fitness.
A certified funnel strategist and feminist money enthusiast. I work with lefty, values-aligned service providers (the ladies, theydies, and gaydies of the online business world).
I'm also a:
Maritimer, Wifey, ADHD Mama, Canadian living in Mexico, musical, mocha latte, and reality TV lover, AND formerly the successful creator and CEO of Baby Mama Fitness.
I’m now the woman who’s about to turn your funnel marketing into the scalable engine it’s never been before.
My clients have walked away with $100k+ launches, recurring revenue streams, and fully booked programs. Because their funnels finally start pulling their weight.
I’m now the woman who’s about to turn your funnel marketing into the scalable engine it’s never been before.
My clients have walked away with $100k+ launches, recurring revenue streams, and fully booked programs. Because their funnels finally start pulling their weight.
But don't take my word for it:
- You want someone to take the strategy completely off your plate and hand you a finished funnel (that's my done-for-you retainer, and it starts at $2,900)
- You're in a season where you cannot carve out time to look at data, implement fixes, or show up for your business
- You're still figuring out your offer and change your mind every few weeks
- You want a team member who takes direction and implements, not ideates
- You're looking for passive income (unfortunately, I don't believe funnels are passive)
If you're past the DIY phase, but you don't have 2k to drop on a retainer...
- You want to know what is going on IN your business and don't just want to hand off the strategy piece
- You've been meaning to fix your funnel for six months and haven't because you have no idea where to start
- You know your sales should be better but cannot, for the life of you, figure out what piece of the puzzle is missing to make it all work together
- You want someone in your corner who knows YOUR business, not just 'best practices'
- You are DONE buying courses that give you more information and also more confusion
WTFUNNEL?!? IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR.
Unprompted copy praise from clients...
For $297.
Not $2,900 — which is what a full funnel build with me costs.
Not $15,000 — which is what I paid an agency that ghosted me, forgot to put a budget on my ads, and made me cancel my launch entirely. (That one still stings.)
Not another $500-$2,000 course you implement alone at midnight wondering why nothing is converting OR that inevitably ends up in your course graveyard (ask me how I know...)
$297/month or $797 for 3 months.
You already know what staying stuck costs you.
Or ...
You can keep white-knuckling your way through launches alone.
Keep making every funnel decision in a vacuum.
Keep buying courses that give you more information and somehow less clarity.
You can have a certified funnel strategist in your corner every single month.
Because brilliant women, theydies, and gaydies making more money with their businesses changes the world.
You deserve the f*ck-you money.
The never-take-a-bad-client-again money.
The launching-doesn't-feel-awful money.
I built WTFunnel?!? because you shouldn't have to figure this out alone OR pay agency prices to get a strategist in your biz.
Ten founding member spots. Doors close October 1st.
Looking for CAD pricing? I've got you, eh.
JOIN WTFUNNEL?!?
Yup. Whatever you're offering, you can scale with a funnel.
We build one.
That's what the hot seat calls are for. You don't need to arrive with a working funnel. You need to arrive with an offer and a willingness to build.
Building from scratch with a certified strategist normally costs $2900 done-for-you.
$297/month means you build it with support and actually understand what you're building.
Bring it. We walk through it live on the call.
All calls are recorded.
You get the full recording and the notes.
You can also submit questions in advance and I'll answer them on the call even if you're not there.
Emails, subject lines, CTAs, sales page copy, landing page copy, nurture sequence maps, pre-launch sequence maps, data you want me to interpret, or homework from our calls. If it's funnel-adjacent and you want expert eyes on it, it qualifies.
Monthly members can cancel any time. There are no refunds for a prepaid month, but I don't want you to feel stuck somewhere you aren't getting what you need.
BUT! I will say that, 3 months is the minimum amount of time before you start to see real momentum with a funnel.
That gives you enough time to get a bunch of eyeballs on your stuff and peeps through your funnel.
Three-month prepay locks in the founding rate for the full three months.
Our first call is October 6th.
Which means your funnel will be ready for January and spring launches.
That means our first 3 months together we can build, and if you stick around for another 3 months, you can launch with me inside your business and tweaking as the data comes in.
Live calls will take place on Tuesdays at 12pm ET. This gives you a chance to dig into the content of the week and then ask any questions you need to heading into the weekend.
There are so many opportunities for support.
1) Bi-weekly hot seat coaching calls
2) Bi-weekly funnel submissions for all of your copy frustrations
3) Co-working calls so you work ON your business, not just IN it.
4) Slack access two days a week for any pressing questions.
And you should know that I am an ultimate people pleaser. I want you to get what you need from our time together and I won't stop until you've sold more in your funnel.
Yup! I want you to make the best decision for you. If you have any questions I haven't answered, or just want to make sure I am a real human who can help you, please reach out.
hello@thejenngreen.com
Can I email you with more questions?
What time are the live calls?
How do I know I will get the support I need?
When does it start?
Is there a minimum commitment?
What exactly can I submit for feedback?
What if I can't make a call live?
What if I have a tech-related question?
What if I don't have a funnel yet?
Is WTFunnel?!? for service providers, course creators, or product-based businesses?
FAQs, Anyone?
I want that for you (and then some).
When women make more money, they have more to give, period.
🎉
When women make more money, they have the power to leave – a city, a job, a relationship - instead of staying anywhere that doesn’t serve them.
💃🏼
Women tend to reinvest more than 90% of their assets and earnings back into their families for nutrition, education, healthcare and more – compared to 44% of men.*
When women make more money, they invest back into their communities.
🌟
46.7% of women donors give to causes that support women and girls, compared to 37.1% of men.*
When women make more money, they have access to new levels of care and healing.
💛
Up to 93% of women give to charity or volunteer, compared to 80% of men.*
When women make more money, they donate it.
🌈
A big reason I do the work I do is because I deeply believe that making more money, for women, is a deep form of self-care and significantly important for the world as a whole.
I want you to make more money, and also feel okay about wanting that.
Listen, love, because I also need you to hear this:
I will, under no circumstances allow hate speech, racism, homophobia, fatphobia, etc in any of my spaces. We can disagree on many things, but these are not up for debate.
I set these boundaries to create a safe space. If that aligns with your values, wonderful – I look forward to working together and I’m so excited to support you as you grow and build your business and change your corner of the world. 💗
💗 I believe in honesty.
💗 I believe in justice.
💗 I believe Black Lives Matter.
💗 I believe LGBTQ2+ rights are fundamental.
💗 I believe women are underpaid.
💗 I believe that feminism should be intersectional.
💗 I believe that children are never too young to learn these things.
💗 I believe that education, healthcare, and housing are fundamental rights and should be given to everyone. (And I would pay more taxes if we could live in that society.)
I believe in investing in your values and I believe that running a business is inherently political. You can’t take the politics out of the person and you ‘vote’ with your money.
So, that being said, I only work with people who share my basic values.